Interview #33 Darya Katkavets: From Belarus to California: A Journey of Cultural Discovery

Rick (00:00)

Hi everyone, I'm Rick Barron, your host, and welcome to my podcast, That's Life I Swear. My guest today is Darya Katkavets, and this is her story. 

Every day, millions of people cross borders to begin new lives. But you know what? Adapting to a new country is about far more than learning a language. I mean it means understanding unspoken cultural rules. Like

How people communicate, build relationships, make decisions, and even solve problems. Now, originally from Belarus, Darya has experienced that journey firsthand, and we'll get into that. Today we'll explore how culture shapes our workplaces and daily lives, why misunderstandings happen across cultures, and why curiosity and empathy are essential in an increasingly connected world.

So, this conversation is about immigration, adaptation, and human connection. That said, please join me as I have my conversation with Darya Katkavets. Darya, welcome to the show.

Darya (01:11)

Hi Rick. Thank you for having me today. Yeah, my name is Darya and I'm originally moved from Belarus to California. And for the past few years, I have been building my new life here from scratch. And I work in creative production. I'm managing content for global brands. 

But outside of my work, I'm passionate about art and culture. I like movies, theaters, music, and books. So, I like to explore California and the United States. So, I'm glad to be here and share some of my journey with you today.

Rick (01:50)

That's great. So, when did you start your journey? I mean, what was the motivation for leaving Belarus and coming here to the United States? I mean, and what were some of the biggest emotions you experienced when you arrived?

Darya (02:08)

You know, actually, I think life gave me a great opportunity, and I decided to take it. I won the green card in 2022, and I moved to the United States in 2023. So, I had almost a year to prepare. I saved money and planned everything carefully, so it wasn't a spontaneous decision.

And maybe the hardest part was to prepare our friends and family for the fact that my husband and I were leaving. And when I finally arrived here, I honestly felt I was on another planet.

Rick (02:56)

Why would you say that?

Darya (02:59)

Everything was so different, like the culture, the people, the language, even small things, everyday things like electrical outlets or grocery stores. So maybe it sounds funny, but even simple things felt completely new. So, I think for the first couple of months I felt like an excited tourist.

I had so much energy and curiosity. I wanted to explore everything, visit new places, try new foods, and understand how life worked here. So yeah, I think it was like an adventure every day. So yeah.

Rick (03:43)

Well, that's still a big jump. I mean, you're coming from the other side of the world, and it sounds like you did a lot of planning and all this, and, if I may, how did your husband adapt when he came here to the United States with you?

Darya (04:01)

I think he was in the United States before. Like he had business trips here, so he knew something about America, but me not. And it was like my first experience. So, I think for him it was easier to adapt. Yeah, so yeah.

Rick (04:21)

So, he was probably able to provide you some guidance, to a certain degree.

Darya (04:25)

Yes, that's true.

Yeah, he was in Chicago on his business trips. So, he wanted to show me this city, and I remember when we visited, he was just so excited to show me some places, and yeah. Yeah, show me some places.

Rick (04:41)

Yeah. Well, really quickly, I mean, I can relate to what you were saying about different changes. I mean, I've been on trips to Europe with my wife, you know, Italy, France, Portugal, and you noticed some of the subtle changes that you know, like you were saying, even where you plug in your phone, you know, you have to have an adapter. Things are very different at the beginning. But what were some of the cultural differences that you noticed that surprised you the most when you arrived here?

Darya (05:18)

I still remember arriving in the United States, and one of the first things I noticed, literally within the first hour, was how big the cars were. Yes. In the airport, I remember in the parking spot. It might sound funny, but that was my very first impression.

Rick (05:42)

Well, you know, truth be told, I know when I went to Italy and to France, I think more so with France, I didn't see that many big cars. 

Darya (05:53)

Yes. We don't have like a lot of big cars in my city, like in my country and in Europe, I think as well.

Yeah. Yeah. But maybe, maybe if we're talking about culture, I think I noticed how friendly people are here; like, everybody just asks you some questions: how are you doing? How your day and give you a lot of compliments. It was so unusual for me. Yeah.

Rick (06:22)

Yeah, it's kind of different. It's almost like a shock to your system: why are they being so nice to me, per se, versus that's just how they are, you know? Well, you know, every culture is different, and you have people who simply know what those unwritten rules are because they grew up here.

And I can I think you kind of shared on it briefly here- but what have been some of the cultural habits or behaviors that you've been learning since you've been here? Especially coming from Belarus, because, you know, again, that's a huge jump to take. And I applaud you for making that move.

Darya (07:12)

Thank you. And do you know this theory about coconut and peach culture?

Rick (07:18)

Sounds familiar. Enlighten me.

Darya (07:20)

Yeah. The United States is often described as a coconut or as a peach culture, sorry. Peaches are soft from the outside and hard from the inside, right? So, Americans are usually very friendly; they like smiles, ask how you're doing, and give you a lot of compliments, but at the same time, they become a part of someone's inner circle.

It takes time. And people are friendly, but they also value personal boundaries, so conversations often take longer before they become truly personal. Belarus, on the other hand, is much closer to coconut culture. Coconut is hard on the outside and soft from the inside.

Right? So, people may seem serious and reserved when you first meet them. We don't usually smile at strangers or talk to strangers. So once someone becomes your friend, the relationship is often very deep and loyal, and people are willing to help you, support you, and be there when you really need them. So

Yeah, it's just a different understanding of culture, and it's always shaped by our society, and I think history. Yeah.

Rick (08:58)

That's very interesting. Yeah, because I know I, I think I shared this with you earlier. I worked with people from Israel and got to know quite a few of them well. And first, their demeanor is very brash and upfront. I mean, they speak their mind, and they cut to the chase to explain or define what they're talking about, what the issue is, or how to solve a problem. 

And I think until you get to know them, then they open up to you, as you were saying. There's that establishing that bridge of trust that, hey, I can now talk to you on the same level, and you understand that my expressions or how I say things are not to be taken in a negative way. 

So those are things that I've learned by working in the workplace. I know we had talked earlier, and a book you called out, called The Culture Map by Erin Meyer, was something I think was of help to you. It kind of expanded on what you have been experiencing thus far. I mean, what ideas or information from that book helped you understand better cultures and their differences from what you knew before?

Darya (10:30)

Yeah, you know, this book, I highly recommend to read this book for people who work in international companies. And I think this book completely changed the way I think about communication. Erin Meyer describes eight scales that explain how cultures communicate, give feedback, make decisions, build trust, and even disagree.

And once you understand those differences, communication becomes much easier. You stop asking who's right, why this person is so rude to me, or something like that. You try to understand, like, what this person's background is, what shape his communication is like.

So, for me, this is probably the biggest lesson. If you understand how people communicate, you can build stronger relationships, work more effectively, and feel much more confident, especially in international teams. Yeah.

Rick (11:44)

Mm. Did you have difficulty at first when you came into the American workplace on what you're describing right now?

Darya (11:55)

Yes. I remember when I just started working in my international American company. I didn't understand why people gave me so many details in my tasks. You know, you interviewed me, you know my background, you know that I managed complex projects; why do I need so much information? Right? I'm not like a junior manager.

Rick (12:26)

Ha ha ha.

Darya (12:28)

It was interesting, but after some time I understood that, especially if you work in international companies, it's not that the problem is you.

Rick (12:42)

Yeah.

Darya (12:43)

They try to be clear; they describe expectations from you, so it helps to be on the same page, at least for everybody. So, it's kind of cultural differences. And yeah, we talked about this before; it's also connected to one of the scales in this book, like high- and low-context communication. Yeah, I can say a little bit more about that.

Rick (13:16)

Can you define it, yeah? This is for the benefit of the audience. You know, and for me as well. But what does that mean? 

Darya (13:22)

Yeah. Yeah. High- and low-context communication is about how much information is left unsaid and said. Or if we're talking about it metaphorically, it's like reading the air. In high-context cultures, such as my country, Belarus, Russia, Ukraine, China, and Japan.

People often expect you to understand the situation without every detail explained. Like, communication is usually shorter because everybody shares much of the same context. And in low-context cultures like the United States and Canada, these countries are especially young countries.

People prefer to make everything explicit. They explain expectations clearly; ask questions and make sure everyone is on the same page. So that's kind of a difference.

Rick (14:35)

No, you ever find, though, in since you've been in the workplace here in the United States, even though one is talking, sometimes hand gestures, emotions on the face, that at least from my point of view, is a form of communicating. Have you ever come across a situation where you thought you explained yourself, but the person hearing you, their facial expressions said otherwise?

Darya (15:07)

Mm, it may happen like with me. Do you know this interesting right now it's like a meme, Slavic face? It's kind of when

Rick (15:17)

Okay.

Darya (15:20)

I just look at this person, judging them, with a judgmental view. But it's not like that. It's just that we have, like, a poker face all the time, and it doesn't mean we're unkind or unfriendly. It's just our facial and body expressions, you know.

Rick (15:44)

I've dealt with that in the workplace while in high tech. You know, I worked with a group of Japanese who came to our country. It was like every two months, and we would have sessions. When I first participated, I would ask a question, and the Japanese magistrate just kind of looked at me as if I'd asked a stupid question, and I thought, okay, what do I do now? 

And you know, it wasn't until later on that one of my peers, who happened to be Japanese, was explaining to me the norms and culture of Japan. And he was saying, when he didn't reply to you, it's our way that we are thinking what you just said and trying to formulate an answer that is definitive so that way he understands and he's replying in the manner that, okay, you understand, and we can move on. 

But it's things like that, you know, that you have to take on your own and learn. Cause I think if one doesn't try to understand or ask questions, you know, of the group, like what did I say wrong, that you get that feedback. 

Now I'd have to wonder, I mean, 'cause I for myself, when I worked in high tech, I came across a lot of people who came in from various parts of the world. I mean Japan, South America, Canada. I mean, that's where I met my wife, and Europe. 

But in the time that you've been here, have you come across other individuals from different countries that have had, you know, maybe some difficulty or something in that form of adapting to the American environment, not only the American environment, but the American workplace?

Darya (17:44)

You know, right now I'm working in an American company, and I can say that we have really like a diverse team from all over the world. So, I can notice some differences in impressions in how you get the information, how you understand your colleagues, and yeah, it's a really interesting experience to communicate with people from different cultures. And, for example, I can give you an example of feedback.

Rick (18:30)

Feedback. Mm-hmm.

Darya (18:32)

For example, in my country we always have very, very direct feedback. It’s not so kind, like in America. In America, you can just maybe hear You were good with these things; you will be good with things. I recommend fixing these things, right? And you don't know exactly how you did your work.

Was it really bad, or not so bad, or maybe it's just kind of highlighting some things. But in our countries, as I will tell you about Slavic countries like Belarus, Russia, Ukraine, it's always like you did this wrong, just fix it that, that, and that. Or it's bullshit. You need to fix that. 

So, you know from the first sentence that you did something wrong or something good. So, it kind of helps you to know how you can grow, how you can communicate with your manager, and what you want to fix. Here it's a little bit complicated.

Rick (20:01)

No, I hear what you're saying cause I’ve had different situations where I had a manager who would tell you if you did something wrong, and they kind of worked up to it to tell you what went wrong, but then I had another manager who was to the point immediately. 

And for me, I liked that because I knew where I stood with my boss, what I had to do, and what his expectations were. So, I learned from that and tried to mold my approach to better meet their expectations as best I could. Now I know you were there, and I talked about this prior, and maybe you mentioned it somewhat, but you talked about direct and indirect communication. So how does that work out? I think, in terms of the book itself, I think that's part of the scales, or I'm not quite sure.

Darya (21:06)

Yeah, the first step is to understand that your way of communicating is not the only way to communicate. We all grew up thinking our communication is normal, but it's actually shaped by our culture. 

And if you don't know that cultural differences exist, it's very easy to misunderstand people. You might think someone is being rude because they're very direct, or that someone is being unclear because they are too indirect. But often they just communicate in the way they learn to communicate. And that's why I try to ask myself, like, why does this person communicate in this way? What might their cultural background be? 

That question helps me, like, stay curious. Instead of judging or becoming defensive. And if we're talking about international teams, I think it's also helpful to discuss communication styles openly. For example, if you manage or if you like manage some people, you can say I tend to be very direct

But it's never personal. My goal is simply to solve the problem or improve the work. And you kind of give people in front of you the understanding that it's not your intention to harm these people. Yeah, it's like more kind intentions, yeah. So

Rick (22:57)

Well, from what you're talking about, you know, we perform as by the culture we were raised in. But since you've been here, do you find you've kind of changed in some manner to like, okay, I need to conform t to the American way, so to speak, so I can really maybe fit in better, or do you feel like, but this is who I am? I don't mean any offense. I don't mean to have a poker face as you put it. But I mean,  what have you learned from that? Do you feel like, okay, if I'm going to fit in, I'm going to have to change?

Darya (23:39)

Of course, American culture influenced me. That's 100%. I think for the past few years I've changed. I'm not the same person like I lived in Belarus. And of course I am who I am. I shaped by my culture. impressions, my favorite food, my like arts, understanding, all of that, it's shapes by my culture, of course. And of course, Americans too, because of their Hollywood, you know, because of this culture that I've seen all my childhood and all my like adult lives in Belarus. But if we're talking about, like, cultural influence, of course I see how my international friends, my American friends. Influencing me, I'm not judging like I was maybe like when I moved here. I tried to know people first and then to make some my decision. So yeah I think it's changed me. In a better way. Yeah. Completely.

Rick (25:05)

Okay. Well, you said you had to make some changes or you made some changes. If you want to share, what were some of those changes that you noticed that you changed over time, and why?

Darya (25:22)

I can talk about, like, immigration as a process. It's really hard.

And for example, when I meet my friends who also move to the United States, like they are also immigrants, we always talk about these hard things, you know, like about the taxes, about the documents, about some difficult adult life things.

Right. But I like to communicate with my American friends who have no idea about those things, and we talk about these simple things, like about life. I really, really like that. Like, I think it's really influencing me. And I try to notice life here, you know? And I think it's because of my international communication as well.

Rick (26:42)

Okay, okay. When you first arrived, you had to probably think, well, at least I'm with my husband, you know, I have a friend at least. And adapting to the environment. And I think you said this earlier, maybe in a different way. But did you feel like an outsider for a while? And if you did, what gave you those feelings?

Darya (27:15)

Yeah, I think it's a very important question for me. Yeah, thank you for asking me that. Yeah, I felt like that, especially when people don't understand me because of my accent, or they ask me to repeat myself. And this is maybe the hardest part because I feel like I'm invisible, and I want to say I'm much funnier and smarter in my native language, you know. But the thought that some thoughts help me to understand that this feeling is temporary. Like every conversation, every new experience, every small success helps me feel a little bit more at home here, you know. Right now, after maybe three years I live here. I started feeling that California, the Bay Area, is just my home right now. 

Rick (28:32)

Yeah. Well, California is a whole different culture.  Because I've gone to different states and, like you, I see a cultural change that people are somewhat different. 

And again, it stems, I think, from their upbringing, and I think, in part, just from talking to a lot of people I met when I was in high tech, I learned to have a different understanding and perception of what I was seeing in a different part of the world. I mean, like, when I went to Israel while I was working for this high-tech company, it was my first exposure to the country. 

And first, when my boss asked me, “You know, would you like to come? And I had just started the job. And I said, well, can I tell you tomorrow? Cause I wanted to talk about it with my wife.

Yeah, I just had this fear of what I was going to be walking into. And my wife said, “Look, if your boss is going to go, I don't think you have anything to worry about. Why, because if she felt that way, she wouldn't go either. 

So I went, but you know, I saw the differences when I arrived in that, you know, you work in a culture where, because of their surrounding areas and, you know, different countries that don't really like Israel, they have to be strong; they have to be very tough. And it's like, when I left to come home, just clearing the airport was something else. 

Cause I know when I went with a friend of mine, we were leaving, and we made our first stop, and it was like this small little building, and this guy came out.

And our driver turned around, looked at both of us, and said, don’t worry, you guys don't look like you're terrorists. And I thought, okay. And then as the guy came over, he asked for our passports. And then the next thing, the corner of my eye caught this guy coming up from the other side of the building. And he was a soldier, with his rifle ready. And I thought, okay, what did we do wrong? As soon as I had that thought, I said, okay, you can go on now.

But I had to go through like seven checkpoints before I could actually get to the boarding area. I mean, they checked our luggage, they looked at our passports, and they were asking all kinds of questions just to see if they could cause you to slip up. And I had to realize, as I was sitting down waiting for my plane to take off, that, you know, this is a whole different side of the world. What they're experiencing is something

I hope I never have to experience, but I can understand why these people have a certain demeanor. And to your point, until you live in that part of the world or try to understand it, you can't make a judgment call.

Darya (31:41)

Yeah, that's true. Yeah, and I can add that in the last few years millions of people, like from Belarus, from Russia, and Ukraine, they have had to start their lives over in new countries, and it's incredibly difficult. Like because you're not just changing your address, right? 

You're rebuilding your entire life far away from your friends, your family, and where everything's so familiar for me for you. So here everything is new, like culture, language, people, the healthcare system, like taxes, and even simple everyday tasks take much more effort than they used to.

And sometimes you feel like you're five years old again. So, you know, you know you're capable, you have experience and skills, but you have to relearn how to live in a completely different environment.

Rick (32:48)

What have you found the most difficult part of the United States culture? I know you mentioned something about the tax system. 

Darya (32:59)
Maybe the hardest part for me was communication, not just all these adult details. Yeah. Even in my job, you know, I was never doubted in my professional skills, since I worked in a creative agency for many years before I moved to the United States. And my biggest challenge was communication because, like, in my job, it's communication. It is communication. Like, my job is around discussion, meetings, collaborations, and so imagine doing all that in a different language. 

You know, your brain is translating all the time, trying to find the right words. So you're also trying to understand the culture, the new company environment. And yeah, so I think communication is the hardest part, like switching to a different language. And maybe it will be easier if I speak in English at home, but I speak in Russian with my husband at home.

And I always need to switch like different languages all the time. Like at work in English, at home in Russian and just yeah, it's maybe the hardest part I think.

Rick (34:35)

Well, that's, well, like my wife. She's Canadian, but she has Polish roots. And she and her sister are now learning to speak Polish, and that's when, at least for my wife, she discovered that learning the Polish language is a little difficult. But I really admire her because she studies almost every week. 

She's taking these courses, and she and her sister were planning to go to Poland to visit some cousins that she didn't know she had. And she discovered it when her father, who had passed away, his sister passed away. And she got word of it. And that's what got her started on learning the language, and even having FaceTime calls with the relatives.

And they're ready to go this coming September. And I was getting worried because I told my wife, maybe we wait and see what happens with what's happening in the world, and more so with who our president is. So she's going to hold back, but hopefully she can go next year. 

But I think through my wife too, I've learned she's very to the point, makes decisions very quickly and doesn't beat around the bush. And she says, Where did you get that from? I said, well, I learned from my parents, you know, because her parents grew up during the Second World War. 

So, it was a time when the only person who was going to take care of you was you. So, you have to learn and learn quickly. And that's how she adapted those types of habits, and I learned from her, so she's been a good teacher for me, and I love her for it. But yeah, it's I don't know. I look at the world today, and where we are, and you know, for the life of me I just can't understand how and when we're going to work as one. You know, when you look at the cultures and the differences. Yeah, it's difficult. It really is. I mean, I don't know what your point of view is on the political scene that we have today. What are your thoughts?

Darya (37:07)

Mm, it's hard, complicated question for me. Because I experienced all of that a long time ago. Like, if you know the Belarusian story, I would not like to talk a lot about that, but it was a hard time in 2020. Yeah, so I feel like in 2020 it started for me as a Belarusian citizen and it's continue like everywhere I go I see like the same problems and I know that every country has its own problems, and it's only you who decide what you like what with you okay with that or not. Like you decide what's like priority for you. Yeah, so

Rick (38:09)

No. That's a good way to put it. What do you think? You know, we have this story going on here with our country. I mean, our country, the United States, was built on immigrants, but it seems today that word immigrant has a nasty tone to it. And since you've been here, what do you think Americans have a problem with? What don't they understand about people wanting to come here to start a new life just like, you know, their ancestors did? 

Darya (38:52)

Mm, yeah, I wish more people understood that immigration isn't just about moving to another country. It's just about rebuilding your entire life from scratch. While being far away from your family and your friends. And most people don't leave because they want to or because it's so easy.

They leave because they hope for a better future or better opportunities. And I think making that decision takes a lot of courage because it's a huge risk and it's a huge responsibility. And one thing that isn't always helpful is when people say to you, well, you can always go back, right?

And usually, people said it's with the good intentions, but after you invested so much energy and time and emotion into building your new life, like going back isn't a simple solution.

Rick (40:04)

Yeah. It could be a whole lot more difficult than you realize.

Darya (40:08)

Yes, that's true. So, I think immigrants need a little more patience, understanding, and kindness. And maybe these small things help you make a huge difference when you're trying to build a new home.

Rick (40:29)

Yeah. I mean, you brought up a topic, and it's a short story about my wife and me when you were saying that coming to a different country can be difficult and making that move is a risk cause you don't know what you're going to encounter. You mean you may have said, okay, I planned everything, and then when you get there it's like, Wow, this is not what I thought it was going to be. So what I'm getting at is

Before my wife moved down here from Canada, we both knew we were going to get married. And she was getting things packed, and her friends were helping her, and the moving company was there, and she called me saying, okay, they're here, they're packing up everything. Don't forget to pick me up, you know, at the airport later on today. And I thought she was just kind of funny. 

She calls me again. Okay, the movers have left; they've taken everything, so I'm going to be spending my time with my friend tonight. Don't forget to pick me up at the airport, okay? And then she calls me one more time in the evening to ask me the same question. Anyway, when she arrives and we're driving home, I say, Why did you keep asking me that question? And she goes, Well, I know we're going to get married, I know you love me, but look at the change I'm making.

And she meant it in a good way. It wasn't like she was having second doubts. But she was leaving her family; she was leaving her country to spend the rest of her life down here with me. And I think she knew, and not to toot my own horn, but I said, I wouldn't do that to you. But I had to stop and realize what was going through her mind. So, I didn't make an issue out of it. I just said, okay, now I understand.

But yeah, it can be extremely difficult to just pack up things and just walk out the door. And, but you know, thank God everything's worked out fine. So

Darya (42:39)

Mm-hmm. Yeah.

Rick (42:42)

No, we're very we're very happy. So, seeing America as it is today, is it different from when you first arrived? I mean, I'm sure you've seen a lot of changes. How is your husband? Is he doing well? Does he like it here? Is he adapting? 

Darya (42:58)

It's always, he said, like yesterday, our friends asked us, "Do you like America? Do you like California?" And he asked, you know, "Right now, I can say yes."

Rick (43:09)

That's a good answer.

Darya (43:12)

Yeah, I think when we just moved to the United States, we didn't understand, like, do we like it or not? Because it was completely different, and it was a hard question, and people just always ask us, What do you feel?

How you like what do you think? And I just I don't know. I don't know. Like, give me some time. I don't know. Like, I need some more time to understand. Yeah. And yeah, right now I think I like America. I like living in California, and I think my husband said the same thing. We see some issues. I like disagree with a lot of different things. But my quality of life is much higher than it was in Belarus three years ago.

So, I think I should be grateful for that. So yeah.

Rick (44:10)

Well, I mean the United States, you know, is a good country. I mean, we have our faults. There's no question about it. But based upon what I've experienced since I was born here, I've been very fortunate. I really have. And I don't know what my life would have been like had I been somewhere else in the world, what I would have experienced. You know, I could have been with somebody in, you know, Portugal saying, Gee, I wish I could go to America

But you know, I think that's part of what we need to understand about our cultural differences: we must be patient and sit down and talk. But I think the most important thing people just can continue to miss is we have to listen to why this person would have given me that answer. Because I don't understand. 

And again, when I go back to that experience I had when I went to Israel, I thought, you know what, I'm getting a whole different outlook now on why these people have to be so tough and why they're very upfront and to the point. And I think you're seeing it now too, when you've been here in America, and I'm sure your husband has seen it, that a lot of things are different here than what you probably experienced in Belarus. 

Every country is going to have its faults; it's going to have its good points. But I think in the end, I'm hoping that the world will one day just understand if there's only one planet Earth. You know, if there's a planet Earth too, let me know. And I'll pack my bags. But you know, until that happens, you know. So, let me ask you this final question.

You've shared a lot about your experiences, your feelings, and I found your answers to be very poignant and to the point. But if you were to talk to someone, say they were talking to you, and you're getting to make the move here to the United States, what advice would you give them? What would you suggest?

Darya (46:28)

I think I would borrow one word from Ted Lasso, believe. Yeah.

Rick (46:33)

That's good. I like that.

Darya (46:36)

Yeah, like, believe that you're learning the language. Believe that you'll find your people. Believe that one day this unfamiliar place will feel like home. So, starting over is never easy, but it's worth giving yourself the chance to succeed.

Rick (46:56)

That's good. Yeah.  Well, like you said, to the point. One word: believe. I like that.

Darya (47:02)

Yeah.

Rick (47:03)

I never watched the show, but I guess I'm going to have to watch it now. Yeah. 

Darya (47:06)

Yeah, I highly recommend it. A new season is coming, so you should watch it.

Rick (47:10)

Okay. So, listen, I always like to end our conversation with what I call speed round questions, and I provided you the questions, and I'll share with you that over time that I've asked people these questions, the answers have been sometimes very funny, very deep, but sometimes they don't know how to answer the question. And you can see how simple it is. But let me give you the first question. What was the best live concert you ever attended and why?

Darya (47:46)

The best one is Lincoln Park. I was in Belarus ten years ago with Chester Bennington, and I was last year with the new singer, Emily Armstrong, and this is the same band, and this is a completely different experience, but both concerts are the best for me. Yeah.

Rick (48:11)

That's great. That's great. No, I've never heard of them. What was the name again? We’ll see. Lincoln Park. Lincoln Park, okay. 

Darya (48:15)

Really? Lincoln Park. Yeah, this is rock band.

Rick (48:22)

Okay, I'll have to look that up. Well, you must forgive me. I'm seventy-six, so I'm a little bit older than you.

Darya (48:24)

They are so famous. In my like millennial teachers.

Rick (48:36)

What do you wish you had more time to do and why?

Darya (48:39)

Hmm, I wish I had more time to experience art and culture. I'm a huge fan of movies, books, music, theater, and I always feel like it's not enough time to explore everything. You know, if I had more time, I'd watch more films, I'd go to more concerts and musicals, I'd read a lot more books, so for me it's just not a hobby, it's just the best way to understand people and the world around us. So, I really like it. And sometimes I feel like there's not enough time to do it.

Rick (49:16)

Yeah. I love reading too. I have a lot of books. A little short story here. I remember during COVID, I was trying to think, okay, I got to keep myself busy. So, someone said they had read fifty-two books in one year. I thought, okay, I'm going to try that. I got the forty-seven and then I gave up. But it was fun. It was fun. 
 
 What was your first paying job?

Darya (49:42)
I was a waitress when I was a student. Yeah, I wanted to have more money, and yeah, I had a part-time job as a waitress.

Rick (49:53)

That's great. So, here's another question. And I'm going to change it just a little bit. If your husband wrote a book about you, what would the title be?

Darya (50:11)

Long-Awaited Wife. Because we have known each other since we were six years old, and he fell in love with me from the first grade.

Rick (50:29)

Wow.

Darya (50:30)

Yeah, but we were like close friends, but not any romantic relationships and maybe only six years ago we just started dating each other. Yeah. So, I think it's like yeah.

Rick (50:44)

That's a great story though. I love that.

Okay, so you're coming home from work, you're dead tired, and you just want to have your comfort food that makes you feel better that okay, I just finished the week. What would that comfort food be? What's your favorite?

Darya (51:04)

Mm, as a Belarusian person, I'd like to say potato.

Rick (51:10)

Ha ha ha.

Darya (51:12)

I really like potato dishes. I like everything with potato. yeah, and we have like a lot of them in my culture.

Rick (51:23)

Okay. Final question. What would you attempt to do if you knew you couldn't fail? I mean, there are no barriers, you know, it's like it's all yours, make it happen. What would that be?

Darya (51:41)

Mm, I think maybe I like acting, and I like singing. And I was thinking maybe I can just sing in the musicals, you know?

Rick (51:53)

That's great. That's great.

Darya (51:55)

Yeah, so maybe something like that.

Rick (51:59)

What kind of music would that be?

Darya (52:03)

Mm, like Broadway shows, like you know I like that theatre experience and yeah, maybe something like that.

Rick (52:14)

That's great. I love that. So, Darya, this has been a wonderful conversation. I appreciate your openness and sharing some of the things you've experienced since, you know, coming here t to the United States. 

And again, you know, I applaud you and your husband for making such a big move. Again, as you called out, and as I shared with you, my wife told me, you know, it's not an easy move to make, because there is a risk.

And I think in the long term, you know, hopefully it'll continue to be wonderful for you and your husband. So, to that end, I will tell my friends who are listening: I hope you've enjoyed the show, and we'll look forward to talking to a new guest in the time to come. So, everyone, thank you again and take care.