Interview #17 Lauren Van Duyn - The Mom-demic Diaries: Stories of Resilience

Transcript, Aug. 11, 2025

Rick Barron (00:00)

Hi everyone. Welcome to my podcast. That's life. I swear. I'm your host Rick Baron. 

My guest today is Lauren Van Dyne. She's a Jack of all trades. She's a recruitment manager and recently a podcaster. But more importantly, Lauren is the mother of two children who live through what many of you experienced together. Being a parent during the COVID pandemic.

Lauren launched her first podcast in July of this year titled The Mom-demic Diaries. Now she had in mind to create something completely different with her podcast. It wasn't just another how-to parenting show, but a space where mothers could sit and discuss the raw unfiltered truth of what it meant to raise children when the world turned upside down. 

Lauren's podcast celebrates the incredible humans’ mothers became while raising the next generation through a moment in history they didn't see coming. Now there were many struggles for parents during that time but I think the one that hits the most was that the childhood you thought you'd give your kids was placed on hold without you having a vote. 

Now there's a million and one stories out there and Lauren is just getting started. 

So please join me as I have my conversation with Lauren Van Dyne. Lauren, welcome to the show.

Lauren (01:32)

Hi Rick, thanks for having me.

Rick Barron (01:34)

It's so good to have you here ⁓ I guess maybe just kind of do a little bit of an introduction of yourself a quick background of what you've been doing prior to starting the podcast and where you are currently

Lauren (01:48)

Yeah, sure. So, hi, I'm Lauren to all your listeners. So, I am, as you said, a mom of two. I have two girls. They are now five and two and a half. So, we're approaching kindergarten in a couple of weeks, which is very exciting. And my oldest is kind of like my walking timeline of when the pandemic was because she was born in April, 2020.

So, when everyone else is like, can't believe the pandemic was five years ago. I'm like, I can, because I have a five-year-old. And so, I have worked in recruiting for many years. So, podcasting has actually been really a kind of smooth transition for me because I'm used to talking to strangers. I'm used to asking them questions and kind of probing further to get insights. 

And, you know, I'm getting used to listening to myself on recording. That's something I never really liked. But I've gotten used to that. And I'm just really, really enjoying learning from so many women about what their experiences were like in the pandemic, because every story is so unique.

Rick Barron (03:01)

Wow. Now the title of your podcast, The Mom-demic Diaries. How'd you come up with that? Was that serendipity?

Lauren (03:11)

It was a little bit of help from chat GPT. I'm not going to lie. no, I, I was playing around with a lot of different ideas around the pandemic and mothering and parenting. And, I came across, I think it was like an article somewhere. It talked about the pandemic being a Mom-demic because it was so uniquely challenging for moms.

And that just really stuck with me because I felt like it really grabbed you in the title that it's really very centered around moms and giving us that space. And while it's very focused on pandemic parenting right now, I have a feeling that over time it may evolve into something a little bit broader. But even as that happens, I think the biggest, one of the biggest themes coming out of it is burnout and self-care. 

And so, I think that burnout itself is a bit of a pandemic with moms. And so even as it possibly transitions into this new stage sometime in the future, I think that title will still really work.

Rick Barron (04:18)

No, absolutely. So many would ask, well, the pandemic has been over now for five years. Why now? Why get into this discussion of kind of, you know, for lack of a better word rehashing old news.

Lauren (04:33)

Yeah, for sure. I, years ago, had started writing as a form of catharsis. And, you know, it's been really helpful for me to write in a journaling aspect, but I've also started writing what could potentially turn into a memoir about my experience in the pandemic. 

And it's been really, really helpful to process a lot of what happened and, and find some peace with it and find some opportunity to move on from it and process it. And in that process, I had reached out to some of the moms in my own personal network because I thought this could be a really fun project. 

This could be maybe like a collection of short stories from mothers all over who had very unique experiences. And then not everyone has an interest in writing and everyone's so busy and it's tough to set aside that time for that or to make yourself even extra vulnerable because not only are you telling your story, but you're also writing, which might be something that isn't really up your alley. So, I thought, well, the podcast thing just came to mind and I thought, well, why does everyone have to write their stories? Why can't we just talk about it? 

And I felt like it would be really interesting to just talk to a variety of people who have such a variety of different unique experiences and circumstances in the pandemic and hear about, you know, how it relates to what I went through and also how it didn't. 

And most importantly, give those moms the chance to do a little bit of what I've been doing, which is processing it before we continue to move on past it, because it's been five years. And especially as moms, think we just day to day, we plug away, we get through the day, we prep for the next day, and we are always, you know, having a million things to do.

And so, I think taking the time to really reflect back and think about how it impacted us, grieve what we lost, celebrate our triumphs, and really process it before we move too much further away from it, I think is really beneficial.

Rick Barron (06:42)

Absolutely. Now I've listened to all of your podcasts thus far. And for those who are listening, I would ask you to please go visit the Mom-demic Diaries. What I heard was a lot of, like you said, raw conversation, just letting it out, the emotions I heard. 

As you've done, think what six or seven now thus far. Okay. Oh, great. Excellent. Have you heard of, I'm trying to say here, have you, did you hear a particular theme throughout these discussions that it seems like, yeah, these have been the top two or top three issues, hurdles that all of these people went through during this very sad time.

Lauren (07:15)

Yep, think six is coming out tomorrow.

Yeah, I think one of the big ones is just lack of connection. Think feeling isolated, feeling the weight of so many things on your shoulders is definitely a through line for all of them. 

But I think also what's been really interesting is that I've been hearing a lot of positivity around what has come out of it and what moms have discovered about themselves and how they took that really challenging time and turned it into a learning opportunity in some way, or form. 

So, it's been really interesting because there's been a lot of really, as you said, emotional and really raw, vulnerable stories of really struggling. 

But I think everyone without me even really probing too far has naturally, you know, kind of transitioned the conversation into some of the positives that came out of it as well, which I think is kind of a motherhood resilience in and of itself. That, you know, we're always trying to find the positives and find a way to take what is forced upon us and make it something that can be beneficial for us and our families.

Rick Barron (08:38)

Right. Sure, mean, one of the takeaways I took from the episode you've done thus far, and I think you kind of alluded to this early on, is you're a mother. You have children. I don't have time to digest what's happening. I have to take care of them because if I don't take care of myself, I can't take care of them. So, I can't imagine that as a parent,

When that moment hit, I guess the safety net was gone, so to speak. There were no schools, no daycare. And to some degree, some people didn't have family support. In terms of that, how did you adapt? I mean, I feel like you had to adapt. You really had no choice, so to speak. But how did you make it through? 

Lauren (09:25)

Mm-hmm. Yeah.

You know, what's interesting, and I talked about this on one of the recent episodes, is that because I was a first-time mom, it was all I knew. So, I had a vision of what I thought, you know, becoming a mom and postpartum experiences and having a newborn would be all about. And it certainly wasn't that. 

But it's funny because then when I had my second and we would hit certain milestones or certain things would happen, it felt so strange to be in a quote unquote normal world because it was so not what I was used to. 

So, for, think it was even really uniquely different for parents who became a parent or parents who had, you know, their second or third or fourth child during the pandemic, because that might've been even more of an adjustment. And so, I think for me personally, I mean, I was really lucky all things considered. By the time we were, I was going back to work.

Rick Barron (10:30)

Hmm.

Lauren (10:39)

Our daycare was still open as usual and I had daycare the three days a week I intended to. I have family nearby and my mom and my sisters were both very happy and excited to be coming over and helping out. And so, I was very, very lucky in that sense. And also, that I got to work remotely from home and do my job from home, which made things a little easier. 

So, all things considered, I think that I did pretty well adjusting to those aspects of it. But it was really hard just to feel so anti-social. I'm a recruiter. I'm now podcasting. Clearly, I like talking to people. so just being stuck at home, holed up on the couch with a tiny infant who was not talking back was challenging. I felt very...under stimulated in that way. And I was actually really looking forward to going back to work so that I could have those adult conversations and kind of get my brain going.

Rick Barron (11:46)

Sure.

Now in the conversations that you've had and maybe a conversation not on a podcast, what do you feel was, the most difficult grief that some of these people went through in terms of dealing with this?

Because for me, when it all happened, my first instinct was, OK, how long is this going to last? Is there hope on the horizon? And it was just anyone's guess as to what and how long this was going to take. 

So, I think for the most part, I have to wonder, did you ever hear from someone, whether on your podcast episodes thus far or in a private conversation that really hit you, that really made you think, my God, I thought I was having a rough time, but this person, it was just, they were going bonkers. 

Lauren (12:45)

Yes, absolutely. And I think that's such an important point to make because I think for especially those in the millennial generation, I think we were all raised on a pretty healthy dose of someone else has it worse and be grateful for what you have. I think, yeah, its amazing what other people have been through. And I think, you know, my first episode talking to a former colleague, Stacey.

She talked about being separated from her stepson for months because she and her husband were co-parenting with another household and her stepson's mother wasn't comfortable with him going to their house because her husband was going to and from the office every day. And so that was deemed too risky.

And so, she didn't physically see or hug her stepson for months and neither did her husband. And I cannot imagine that sort of separation. And it's so difficult, I think, back on all of the varying degrees of how comfortable people were with, you know, bending the rules or how careful people were versus how reckless other people were. And there was a wide spectrum. And it's really hard to look back on it with what we know now.

Rick Barron (14:01)

Mm-hmm.

Lauren (14:11)

And it's really hard to look back on it with what we know now and be totally okay with all the decisions that were made. We were all doing the best we could at the time. Like I feel that, you know, that kid's mom was, she was worried, she was scared and you know, she was right to be. And she did make the decision that she felt was the safest, but unfortunately it harmed everyone and maybe it wasn't the right decision. Who even knows at this point?

And I have, you know, similar thoughts myself on decisions I made during the pandemic and whether they were the right ones. And I have to really stop myself from thinking too much about it because you can't go back in time. And we did the best we could with the information that we had. 

And there's no real point in going over and over and over what we could have done or should have done differently. And that's where I think just the acceptance and grieving the loss of whatever it is that we lost is really important because otherwise we could drive ourselves crazy.

Rick Barron (15:09)

Oh, God, absolutely. You kind of brought up the thought and what you were just saying right now, but I have to ask, what did you discover about a strength you think you didn't have when you were going through this that like, wow, I didn't think I could do that, but I did.

Lauren (15:28)

Interesting. 

I think the decision to really, honestly, I think this kind of comes down to motherhood in general, but I think it was kind of on steroids at that time, was really just putting aside whatever I wanted and focusing so much on what was the right choice for my daughter. 

I had to make the decision to not go say goodbye to my grandfather when he was in hospice and not allow him to meet her, which I think he'd kind of been holding on for before she was born, and had to make the decision not to go see him or bring her. And that was really hard. You my sisters went to see him. My mom was there. I really wanted to go give him one last hug. And I really wanted him to meet his great granddaughter, but it just felt like something that was too risky. 

And so, I think really having to just draw the line between what do I want and what is the safest for my daughter and just I found it actually almost kind of easy to make those decisions because suddenly what I wanted was just really not of importance anymore.

Rick Barron (16:51)

Right. Again, going back to some of your episodes, ⁓ and maybe to people you've spoken offline here.

I would have to imagine that as strong as you had to be, you had to have had a moment where you just, you just broke down. I mean, you deserved it because everyone was going through it. I went through it, because I was taking care of my father, you know, before he passed away and trying to juggle that with everything else. It just got to be a little bit overbearing, but I, you know, I went into autopilot.

Lauren (17:11)

Mm-hmm.

Rick Barron (17:27)

That's all I could do. And it wasn't until after we got past this pandemic and then my father passed away, I was just sitting in a chair, listening to some music and I can't remember the name of the tune. But as soon as I heard the words to that tune, I just broke down and fell to the floor and cried. I thought, I got to let it out. Did you ever have a moment like that or people that you've spoken to who had moments like that?

Lauren (17:28)

Absolutely. I think we all did. You know, in hindsight, I'm actually surprised I didn't have more of those moments. you know, like I, there were definitely a few that come to mind. You know, there was, actually, was one night when I could not get Nora to my daughter to go to sleep, stay asleep. She would do this thing where she was never one to really, catch on with the pacifier, didn't really care for it. 

And she was nursing, so she would nurse, she would be tired and sleepy, she'd fall asleep, but she'd fall asleep before she really ate enough. And so as soon as I went to go put her down, or 10 minutes later, she'd cry because she was still hungry. And or maybe she wasn't hungry, but instead of, you know, having a pacifier, she was just using me as a pacifier.

Rick Barron (18:40)

Hmm.

Lauren (18:47)

So, it got to a point one night, I think at like 10 o'clock, she just would not go to sleep and I just lost it. And I texted my husband, I was like, you need to come in here. And he came in, he grabbed her and I remember I literally sat on the floor of the shower until the hot water ran out because, and I just sobbed and he was right on the other side of the bathroom door in the chair rocking Nora and he heard the whole thing. 

And literally, I only stood up and turned the shower off because the water was getting cold. It was cathartic to just let it all out and I felt like I'd been trying to hold it together and having those few moments of just really like letting loose was so, so, so helpful. And I am honestly surprised I didn't do that more often.

Rick Barron (19:21)

Well, I guess to a certain degree too, it's also kind of a cleansing moment that you kind of just release all of that energy and realize I'm human. I can be super mom as long as I can, but there's a moment where the kryptonite hits and you have to just let it go. 

In the people that you've spoken to thus far, and again, in private discussions and the children that they all have, that they're all of various ages, that they find it difficult with the kids for them to understand, mom, what's going on? I'm trying to understand why we can't do this and why we can't do that. How did you deal with that?

Lauren (20:27)

Yes, absolutely.

So, I was lucky in that I didn't really have to deal with it because my daughter was so young. So, she never, by the time she would have had to wear, like would have had to wear a mask, masks weren't mandatory anymore. So, and she looks at pictures now and it's like, why is auntie wearing a mask? Why is Mimi wearing a mask? Like holding her and I'm like, well, I'll explain it to you at some point. But I remember.

I went on maternity leave shortly after my manager at the time also went on maternity leave and I felt so deeply for her because she had a new baby at home that she had planned to have this nice leisurely maternity leave with, but she also had a three-year-old and her three-year-old, his daycare was closed. He did not understand why he couldn't go see his friends.

He was craving that structured activity and all those things. He would see his neighborhood friends outside and would be told he couldn't go outside to play with them. He was asking about family members and when is Uncle So-and-so going to visit? And so, he was having a really hard time and she was not really able to explain to him in a way that he could understand. And at the same time, she is now losing out on that one-on-one bonding opportunity of maternity leave with her daughter.

Lauren (21:50)

Her son is struggling to understand what's going on and struggling with the new shared focus and attention with baby sister. And so, I remember just feeling so much for her because I've said so many times, I've been really grateful in some ways that Nora was so young and that she was born in the pandemic and she wasn't older because all of the burden was on me. She doesn't remember any of it. She was totally unaffected. She was happy as a clam. So, it was hard for me but it was not a hardship for her in any way.

Rick Barron (22:23)

What about other parents that you know where they had, you know, teenagers? I mean, I'm sure that had to be over the top for them. Like, what do I do with my teenager? Because shutting them down that they can't go anywhere. Can you share any insights as to what someone told you? What they, how they dealt with it?

Lauren (22:33)

Yeah, for sure. mean, I think communication is really what it comes down to always. And at least with the teenagers, can somewhat reason with them, I think. I know of a few parents who were parenting teenagers across multiple households at the time. 

And I think that that was really challenging because not again, not everyone had the same views of what was safe and what the right decision was around certain things. 

And so, you know, for a kid who maybe just got their license is heading into senior year of high school, has this thriving friend group, has their first, you know, job doing in retail and to suddenly have your social life completely ripped away from you and probably to want to go to school probably for the first time ever.

Rick Barron (23:34)

What a concept.

Lauren (23:35)

Exactly. And then to have two households that maybe have differing opinions on what's okay, what's not, and that conflict can be really, really difficult.

Rick Barron (23:47)

Sure. Were there moments where during this time that there was a humorous moment that made you realize, you know what, we're going to make this. We're going to make this. And maybe to give you an example, for me, I'm not a parent, but I lived with people who had kids. 

And one day we decided we're going to go out put chairs on the sidewalk and we'll keep our distance, but we'll talk to one another. And then as we were talking, we had other people across the street do the same thing. I don't know how this worked out, but we saw people who were coming down the street and there was like, maybe six of them, but they were walking sort of like in like in a parade mode and just walking in the middle of the street. 

So, one of the girls said, we're having a parade. Look at the people go by. And everyone just roared with laughter and realized, you know, things are miserable right now, but a child just told us, we're going to get through this. Did you ever have a moment like that that or other people have explained to you what they came across that made them feel it's tough, but we're laughing and we're going to survive.

Lauren (25:07)

Yeah. that's funny. I'm sure there are many of them. ⁓ I think one of the things for me actually is we had lived in the house we were renting for two years at that point and we had never really met the neighbors from across the street. 

We were in a duplex and we knew the neighbor right next to us and she, we would have lawn dates where we would come outside in the lawn and we would sit on either each of our respective sides and we would chat and whatever. 

But we discovered that the neighborhood girls across the street were absolutely obsessed with our cat because our cat would sit in the window facing the street all the time. And so, I don't remember what it was, but I think they made up their own name for him at one point. And they were like telling me about him as if he wasn't my cat because they just watch him in the window all the time. And we had never even met these people before. 

But through that, we ended up becoming pretty friendly with them and they would ask about the cat all the time. and it was just really this moment of we're all living our own little lives and we're, we're in these little bubbles and even more so, you know, in the pandemic, but there were those moments of connection that were just so serendipitous where it was like, yeah, we've lived across the street from these people for all this time. I had no idea that these two adorable little girls are just obsessed with watching our house because of our cat. And that was so funny. And it was really just a lovely moment of connection that just made it feel like, okay, the world feels upside down right now, but there's still the simplicity of just neighbors being neighborly.

Rick Barron (26:36)

Hahaha.

Sure, mean, it's kind of ironic how sometimes it's those types of moments that bring out the humanity of people to make them understand this is it, this is what we have. This is Mother Earth and we're gonna have to get through it somehow. So, I'm sure there were many lessons learned during that time period. 

And when I think about lessons, did you ever hear from other parents that you know were the kids who went through this? I mean, I'm sure someone felt cheated because they weren't going to have that high school graduation or other things that were meaningful for them. But did they ever share with you what some of their kids said? You know what? I know you suffered through this. So did I, but this is what I learned from it. This is what I think has made me a better person. you ever hear stories of that sort?

Lauren (27:55)

Yeah, you know, I think a lot of what it comes back to is the importance of family and friends and those connections. think it's interesting too because I work in recruiting and the software company I work for sells software where companies can use it to send people in their organization recognition awards to celebrate the work they're doing.

And it's a very mission driven company. And what I found was that there was a huge spike after the pandemic, when I came back from maternity leave of people wanting to leave their jobs because they didn't align with the values of the company and wanting, feeling this new, you know, invigoration to work for a company where they felt they were making a positive difference in the world, because it became very apparent to parents and just people in general, think that what really matters is being with your people. 

And we all had this moment in time where we couldn't be with our people. And I think everyone really realized how important that is. And so, you know, I'm hopeful that there might be a return to remembering that, you know, being on your phone isn't all, isn't the most fun thing in the world and that actually having real conversation with people is better. 

But I think for kids, and especially depending on how young they were, I feel like kids got to really experience their parents being home more, depending on the situation, right? Like not everyone had the ability to work from home, but a lot of people did. And so, kids got to experience mom and dad being around more and having family dinner every night and creating magic in your own house and not having to spend money to go out and do things in order to have a good time.

And I think, you know, I've heard a lot of stories of different ways people made a little bit of magic in their own homes with their kids. And I think there's a simplicity there that kind of steps us away from consumerism that I think is really important and that I'm hoping seeped into the brains of some kids. And I know has seeped into the minds of a lot of adults who went through it.

Rick Barron (30:11)

Yeah. mean, I think when we all look back on it, you began to realize what was really important in life. Yes, being a parent to your children, but you kind of took an assessment of where you are and understand that, you know, having all this material wealth, so to speak, it's nice, but in the scheme of things, you know, but really counts. I think.

You know, as time progresses, Lauren, maybe one day you're going to have a discussion with your children when they're old enough to understand this conversation about what took place during the pandemic. What do you think you want to explain to them or define to them how this all occurred, how you got through it and how others got through it?

Lauren (31:09)

Yeah, I think I would want them to understand that it was, it's hard, right? Cause in retrospect, we know more things now about, about the virus, about the pandemic, about how things went down and what worked and what didn't work and making things better. And I think it can be hard even for me now to look back and to realize we just didn't know anything. 

And so, I think it's hard enough making decisions as a parent about what's the right choice in any given day for your kid. And when you throw in something like this, it's not just a virus or any other threat. It's a threat that we really don't know any about. And it's not just that I don't know anything about it. It's that the pediatrician doesn't really know anything about it. It's like the people that you would look to for the answers don't have them. 

And that I think was just this really elevated pressure and anxiety around trying to make the best decisions with the information you have and the information you have is not much. And it's changing every day, right? Like you said, you know, just thinking, when is it going to end? Is it going to be just a couple of months? Is it going to be trying to make decisions in the now when you don't know what three months down the road is going to look like is so, so, so difficult. And then when you're trying to make those decisions on behalf of not just yourself, but also your child, it's incredibly difficult and it's really.

Rick Barron (32:36)

Mm-hmm.

Lauren (32:37)

And then when you're trying to make those decisions on behalf of not just yourself, but also your child, it's incredibly difficult and it's really just like decision fatigue on a whole other level. And so that was really, really, really challenging. But I do hope that one thing that I can teach them and they can learn about through the storytelling of what they were born into and what they lived through is that, again, the most important things in life aren't the things that necessarily can be ripped away from you when a pandemic hits. 

You know, there are ways to connect with people even if you can't be with them in person. being together and feeling connected with people is really, really, really important. And so, putting the effort in and finding the time and making the time for that is super important. And I hope that that's something that I can really instill in them as they get older.

Rick Barron (33:24)

Yeah, I'm sure that's going to be a story one day that'll come, you know, without even knowing when it's going to happen. But now I know, you know, we talk about your podcast, The Mom-demic Diaries, and I think you and I kind of chatted about this, about how women are just, you know, they got to dive in and they got to make it happen. How did your husband handle all this? If I can ask you that question.

Lauren (33:32)

Yeah, yeah. as best as he could, as like the rest of us, know, it, he was great. Mean, one of the, favorite memories of being kind of in lockdown with him and my daughter was his, his first day back after, if you can call it paternity leave, he was off for two weeks. The first of which we pretty much spent all entirely in the hospital. So, he was home with us for maybe eight days before he was then going back to work. And I had been having a tough time with just getting into a rhythm with eating myself. Like I was feeding the baby. I'm so focused on that. I'm focused on what she needs. 

And all of a sudden, I would start to feel really crappy and my husband would be like, when's the last time you ate? And so, I was really just so not focused on myself.

He kind took it upon himself to make sure that I was eating, to offer me food, not even to ask, are you ready for lunch, but just to make some lunch and just kind of present it to me and to make sure that I was eating. And so, my first day home with my daughter alone, he left for work at 5.30 in the morning. He's an electrician. And I went to the fridge to grab my almond milk for my coffee, which he had already made.

And there was a little sandwich sitting on the shelf in the fridge that was wrapped in tin foil and had my name on it. And he, don't think it was preemptive, but it was while he was making his own sandwich for the day. He was like, you know what? She's not going to eat today if I don't help. So, he made me a sandwich and put it in there so that it would be ready for me when I was ready. Um, yeah. So, he was great. mean, I think because I think he realized that it was probably.

Rick Barron (35:28)

Score one for dad.

Lauren (35:39)

So, he was great. mean, I think because I think he realized that it was probably in some ways harder on me than it was on him at this time, because he was able to go out into the world and have conversations and be social and he wasn't nursing and physically, you know, going through the toll of surgery and everything else. He was really great about kind of leaning into what I wanted to do and what I felt was the right decision. 

There was a lot of, I also don't really know exactly what the right answer is, but I'm confident that whatever you think is best, I'm gonna be okay with. And so, there was a lot of trust he put in me, which was wonderful, but also sometimes felt a little bit like extra pressure, because it was like, okay, so it's all on me to decide to make this decision. 

Like, don't want all of that on my shoulders. So, he was really great. And I think it was challenging for him in a variety of different ways, but, yeah, he was really, really supportive and just very present.

Rick Barron (36:38)

That's good. That's good. I know there are a lot of things that my wife and I did because we really couldn't go anywhere, so to speak. So, we learned how to cut each other's hair. My wife was great with me. I was a catastrophe with her.

Lauren (36:56)

I tried cutting Jake's hair once and we didn't do it again after that. It was not good.

Rick Barron (37:02)

So, as you progress going forward with your podcasts, where are you looking in terms of getting people? Because I know you had a doctor, which I thought that conversation was very interesting. Getting it from a doctor's perspective. But I guess it's just anyone who was a parent during that time period that can come along and share their story with you.

Lauren (37:18)

Yeah, I would like to speak with any mom who wants to share her story. you know, I'm just really just starting to scratch the surface. And I think that already in the six episodes that have been released and the couple more that I still have on doc to edit, already there's through lines in all of them and, you know, common themes. But every story and every situation are just so uniquely different because everyone's circumstances were entirely different.

Rick Barron (37:55)

Mm.

Lauren (37:59)

So depending on, you know, if you were working and what your job was, if you were, if you had a partner or you didn't, or you were co-parenting in different homes or whatever the situation might be, the age of your kids, how many you had, if you had family nearby, like there are so many variables that it's just impossible to create the same story with two different people. 

And so, it's been really interesting and the majority of people I've spoken to so far have been people that I already know and just maybe didn't know a ton about their own personal stories. 

But I'm really hoping that as the listener base grows, that I'll get more people who are listening who are just like, you know what, I would do this and send me a message and email in and tell me a little bit about themselves. 

And I would love to just meet more people and more people outside of my own sphere and who have even more different experiences, know, older kids or lived in a different part of the country or in a different country, would love to explore all the different experiences that people had in such a variety of different ways.

Rick Barron (39:06)

Yeah, I was going to ask you, what was your, Geo map, if you will, that you were seeking, where you're just going to stay focused with the United States or look beyond like Europe, South America, because I've done that with some of my podcast’s interviews. I've actually made an effort to just to reach out to people and a podcast community and introduce myself. 

I've been pretty fortunate and, you get a whole different perspective on a life or other lives, if you will. I would imagine that when the opportunity presents itself, and I think it will, you may talk to someone in South America, Italy, France, Canada, and you may find that, they had it tougher than we did. How come we never heard about this? So yeah, I would keep plugging away at that.

Lauren (39:37)

For sure, for sure. I know a little bit about what the circumstances were like in Ireland because the company I work for is dual headquartered. So, I do have a number of friends and mom connections through work who were in Ireland. 

So even just between, you know, the U.S. and there, and even just within the U.S., every state was a little bit different, you know, like the regular, the restrictions here in Massachusetts were very different from the restrictions in Florida versus California versus New York and so even just that in terms of geography is interesting, but especially once you get outside of the US and think about other places around the world, it's just a very different experience for everyone.

Rick Barron (40:42)

Absolutely. So, people who come to your podcast and I know, like I said, you have a million and one stories out there and you're hearing such different outtakes on what people went through. And I think I called this out earlier and what people will gain. 

But what do you hope would be that that one gleaming thought that you want people to say, you know, I went to Lauren's podcast to talk about what happened to me during the pandemic. 

And I also got her side of the story, but I learned something that I never thought I would gain from, from exchanging these types of stories where it was a terrible moment. What might that thought be that you say? I'm glad you got that. I hope you come back again.

Lauren (41:33)

Yeah, for the moms who come on the show and share their stories, I really hope that they find just some comfort and peace in knowing that they are not alone. And also, in one thing I think is really important as the host and even just as a person, as a friend, as a colleague, whatever is really just validation of feelings. 

I think that again, I think so many of us have that someone else has it worse mentality just like flowing through our veins. And it can be really hard to allow ourselves to feel sorry for ourselves or to properly grieve the things that we lost because we know that someone else had it worse. 

And it feels selfish, you know, to spend that time thinking about, woe is me, here's what I lost. And when respectively, you know, maybe you did have it pretty good.

I can sit here and say that I was very privileged in a lot of ways in how I experienced the pandemic. And even then, it was really hard. And it has been hard for me to really reconcile with that. That it's okay for me to process it and to grieve it and to not be okay. Because just because someone else had it harder doesn't mean that what I went through wasn't stressful and wasn't traumatic in some way.

And so, I hope that the moms who are sharing their stories feel like they've landed in a soft place where they feel like they've been validated that what they went through was really hard and that they are really strong and amazing and that they are going to continue to be faced with really big, bad, challenging things and they can get through it. 

And for everyone listening, I hope that you know, same thing, validation for whatever it is you experienced. I hope that even if people don't, you know, reach out to be on the show, that they will make some space for themselves to think about, what did I lose? What should that time have looked like for me? What did I want for my life at that point in time? And what did I not get to achieve? 

You know, how has the trajectory of my life changed based on that situation. And to take the time to grieve what was lost, feel grateful for what was gained and discover their strengths that came out of it and how they took that and turned something positive, brought something positive into their situation. And I hope that we all just can realize and remember that.

Rick Barron (43:58)

Hmm.

Lauren (44:22)

Moms are incredible.

Rick Barron (44:24)

They are, they really are, because I've had some on both sides of my house and one in particular. I mean, they moved about a year ago, but I watched her during the pandemic. And I mean, I got tired just watching her. I thought, how does she do all this? I mean, I would see her packing the car up on a weekend.

And she had, she had a system and she'd get all four kids into the car. They'd be gone for the day, but she made a concerted effort to do things, you know, in a safe manner. They all had their masks on and everything. But I think for her, she realized, yeah, we can stay in the house. And there were times when we're going to have to stay in the house, but I think that was her escape. You know, if we don't get out, we're just going to, you know, go ballistic with one another.

Lauren (45:20)

Mm-hmm.

Rick Barron (45:22)

And I just found her astounding what she did. And I remember one day they, there was a, ⁓ they wanted to redo their backyard during the pandemic. don't know how they got this done, but anyway, long story short, there was a lot of old bushes on the longest side of the fence. And they said, okay, we have to get that stuff out first before we can then start coming in.

God as my witness. I'm looking across her way and I see her with this big bush that she chopped down and she's hauling it out to the front. it, it would be picked up by the, the garbage collection, the next day. And she kept going back and forth, back and forth. And she got it all done. And I asked her, why didn't you call me? I would have helped you. said, no, I want to do this on my own. 

And I gave her a beer, and said, I think you deserve this more than I do. No, but it's just remarkable what one can do and needs to do, but has that drive. And I think I saw that in a lot of mothers during the pandemic.  Resilience was just remarkable what they did. 

Lauren (47:00)

Sure. And I think it's, you know, it's hard to find that time in motherhood anyways, or, you know, and not just for moms too. And, you know, obviously my podcast is focused on moms, it's the Mom-demic Diaries, but I do plan on featuring a few dads here and there. And I certainly don't ever want it to come across as, you know, dads are not helpful, not in the picture are, you know, absent because some are. 

But I know so many incredible dads who are so involved in their kids' lives and we're also really impacted by the pandemic. I think parents in general, it's really hard to find, to make the time. I say make the time because you don't find it. It doesn't just spring up on you. You got to make the time for yourself. And it's really hard to do that. And then you throw in the pandemic. And I think for all of us, it was just you know, impossible to find that time to just breathe and to come back to ourselves.

Rick Barron (47:58)

I'm sure you're gonna have many moments where you'll have someone who was a single parent, a dad or a mom. Now there's a task and it could have been where he was just me. I had no one else to go to. No one else.

Lauren (48:04)

Mm-hmm. Yep, for sure.

Yeah. My episode that's coming out tomorrow actually is a friend ⁓ whose husband was a firefighter. And so, she was not a single parent during COVID, but sometimes I felt like it because he would work 12-hour shifts and she was starting to work remotely from home as a therapist and doing virtual therapy and had an 11-month-old who couldn't go to daycare anymore.

So, she's trying to conduct, you know, helpful therapy sessions for people who are struggling while she herself is dealing with an 11-month-old and knowing that her husband is gone for the whole day going in and out of people's houses, not really sure how safe that is. So even like even that she was not a single parent, but in a lot of ways it felt like it.

Rick Barron (49:07)

Gosh, you ever thought that maybe, I don't know why this crossed my head, that what you're collecting in terms of all this information, that you might one day write a book?

Lauren (49:20)

Maybe. I am in the process of writing my own experience and that could turn into a book. ⁓ And I would still really love to have elements of other moms in there. So, I don't know, I know there's a way to kind of work it all in together, but that definitely, that was like how the whole idea originated was a book that's just like a collection of history, of personal stories, short stories, poems, journal entries, whatever, from moms around the world about their experiences, their most challenging, their most raw, their most emotionally heightened experiences during the pandemic and kind of pulling them all together for, you know, some history for people about, you know, outside of just the statistics of what was happening in the world. This is what was happening in people's homes and how people got through it. I think it would be really interesting for sure.

Rick Barron (50:21)

Absolutely. So, I've been trying something new in my podcast with people, and I think I told you I was going to give you a set of questions, sort of a speed round questions. And I've done a few and some of the feedback I'm getting on some of the responses have been overwhelming. anyway, these are five questions and take your time. So, here's the first one. What was the best live concert you ever attended and why?

Lauren (50:57)

That one's really hard. I've been to a lot of really good ones. I would say one of the best ones was one of the last ones I went to, honestly. It's an artist called Kyola and he's also the lead singer of a band. And this was his side passion project, which was to go out solo on his own. And it was a show that was in the like venue room of a bar in Portsmouth, New Hampshire. 

And so, it's like 40 bucks a ticket and it took an hour and 15 minutes to drive there. And instead of having to go into Boston, which is usually the case, it was a quick, easy ride. was like $5 to park. My husband and I get there, we go upstairs, we grab some food and drinks and we got to sit right there at our high-top table and watch the show. 

I think the artist was maybe like, a hundred feet away from me and it was just very personal. It was very intimate and I love that sort of show where you really get to feel like you're connecting with the artist.

Rick Barron (52:03)

That's so cool. Maybe one day they're going to be a big star. You never know. So, another question. What do you wish you had more time to do?

Lauren (52:06)

I think you will be, Mmm. Clean.

Rick Barron (52:17)

Hahaha

Lauren (52:18)

I know that's such a weird thing to answer her, but I actually really do enjoy cleaning. I'm that person who like if no one's home all day and I can just blast some music and just like that's a great workout and just like really clean. I love a tidy clean space, but it's so hard to do it with two kids and I clean and it's a mess in five minutes. 

So, I honestly, and I don't make a lot of time for it, we have a cleaner come once a month, which is a godsend, but ⁓ in in between, like if I have an hour, I'm probably going to prioritize reading or podcasting or doing something that fills my cup a bit more. So, I wish I had more time to just like no one's home, blast the tunes and just go hard on the cleaning.

Rick Barron (53:07)

My god. Well, full transparency, you know, we have a cleaning service too, but in between sometimes we have to do things and I will help my wife vacuum. I don't know what it is, I like to vacuum. So, it's not a hassle for me. 

What was your first paying job?

Lauren (53:28)

Babysitting. Yep, I was babysitting at the age of 12. I started as like a mother's helper where I would go to this family's home and I would play with the kids and hang out with them while the mom was getting stuff done, making dinner, know, taking care of things around the house. And I'm still connected to the family all these years later.

Rick Barron (53:30)

Really? Wow.

Lauren (53:54)

And it's funny because now we have a babysitter who lives across the street and she does the same thing for us. She has the girls on her own sometimes, but she comes over once a week in the evenings and she just plays with the kids while we get stuff done. 

And I look at her one time and I was thinking, my gosh, I remember being her age and thinking this mom was such an adult and had it all figured out and whatever. And I'm like, there's no way she thinks that about me. But like, am I that adult now? I don't think I am.

Rick Barron (54:22)

Yeah, let's go really quick before you know it. So, we talked about books. So, this next question is, if your parents wrote a book about you, what do you think the title would be and why?

I think they would title it La La Land because when I was little, they often said that I was off in my own little La La Land because even when I was like a baby, I'd sit in my car seat and while other kids might be needing attention, I would just be sitting there like, la la la la la, just like kind of in my own little world. ⁓ And they used to call me La or La La, those were my nicknames. 

And so I think that has stuck because whether it's escaping into a book and going off into a different world there or creating my own little space, my own world, my own, you know, in my imagination, I think all of those things are still pretty true for me and my personality. So, I think they might call it La La Land.

Rick Barron (55:23)

Okay, okay last question. What would you attempt to do if you knew you couldn't fail?

Lauren (55:30)

I love this one. If I knew I couldn't fail, I would open a business that is in my area that is for parents. And I thought about this a lot and I have no idea how to make it happen, but ⁓ I would call it the village. And it would be the whole concept would be that it takes a village to raise a kid and not everyone has a real village or support system.

Rick Barron (55:43)

Hmm.

Lauren (55:58)

And I would want it to be a place where, you know, you could access different resources and or have a couple of like really nicely set up comm rooms that you can rent for like 30 minutes or an hour at a time. Or like if you just want to read and you need a quiet space to read outside of your home, you can go there. 

Or, you know, we could have an event where, you know, bring all your gifts and we'll provide the wrapping paper and we'll all sit around and have happy hour while we wrap gifts around the holidays and just connect with each other and talk and vent and, you know, have discussion groups where we talk about a particular age group or particular challenge of a particular age group. 

But I would want it to just be a space where moms and dads, but parents in general, could just go to leave some of the burden at the door and either get help, support, or just a quiet space to exist for a little while.

Rick Barron (56:58)

Wow, that is a very interesting and beautiful concept. Write that down. 

Lauren (57:04)

It's written down.

Rick Barron (57:07)

Lauren, I really want to thank you. This has been a very interesting conversation and like the audios that I've heard thus far, I think you're on your way. You've got something here to share with so many parents, know, single parents. 

It was a terrible time we all went through, but we made it. And I just want to thank you so much for taking the time to share all this with me and for the people who are listening. 

So that said, I want to thank everyone who listened in. And again, I will provide the links to get to information about Lauren and more in particular, her podcast link. And again, please go visit it. I think you're going to be very pleased with what you hear. So that said, we'll talk to you soon and everyone take care. 

Lauren (58:01)

Thanks, Rick.